As I sat in my car on the ride home from the doctors office I was faced with a decision to make: do I get surgery so I can pursue my athletic career or do I not get surgery and be content with my decision that I will never be able to run without pain again; moreover, I may have to quit the sport I love? Tears streamed down my face. Having surgery meant having 5-inch scars on both sides of both of my legs for the rest of my life as reminders of what I did so I could be able to play college lacrosse. Not getting surgery meant quitting the sport that ultimately made my decision of what college I ended up going to and was the sport that was responsible of some of the greatest times of my life so far.
My dad turns and looks at me and says “Ultimately your surgery is a cosmetic surgery.” Obviously I was confused. It wasn’t like I was getting a nose job or breast implants. The doctor would remove tissue from my legs in order for my muscles to expand more and so I could run without pain or numbness. How is that considered cosmetic? But then I thought the situation over and realized that this surgery wasn’t necessary. My life wasn’t in jeopardy if I didn’t receive the surgery. However, in my mind, receiving surgery seemed like the only option. I love lacrosse, and if the only way I could continue to play was to receive surgery, I was going to get the surgery. But to outsiders, including my parents, surgery was just a huge step to take just so I could play a sport, moreover, and optional sport.
Although I may consider my sport part of my life and huge part of shaping me into who I have become today, my sport does not define me. I would be receiving surgery so I could play something for 4 years and then my career would be over since there is no women’s professional lacrosse. I was stuck. Of course I wanted to play lacrosse, but surgery was such a drastic step to take. Was I mature and willing enough to accept that step, for better or for worse, and accept that I may regret it in the future?
I ended up going through with the “cosmetic surgery.” Currently I have 40 plus stitches in my legs. My legs are swollen and I’ve been so doped up on medication I can’t even watch tv. But in my mind, it was all worth it. Some people look at my parents and me and think we are crazy. They question my parent’s moral. How could they let their 18-year-old daughter go through surgery so she could play a sport especially if the surgery wasn’t even necessary? It’s because they love me and love me enough to let me strive at the thing I love. Sure, I may regret this surgery in the future, I may be angry with my parents that they allowed me to have it, or I may be mad at myself that I let myself get lost so lost in a sport that I was willing to put my life as risk to be able to play at a higher level. But for now, knowing that I will have the ability to play at a level I know I can play at pain free is all the motivation I need to get me through this. I couldn’t be happier with my decision and I am looking forward to making great progress with my new legs. Whether this surgery was an enhancement is a whole other story that only time will be able to tell.
3 comments:
I thought this blog entry was very interesting. It brought up a point of view I had never really thought of. I always looked at surgeries for sport injuries as necessary and completely unquestionable and ethical. It never crossed my mind that some people may not quite see it that way, and that might have something to do with how I look at athletics. I look at athletics as something I can’t live with out and anything (including a surgery) that allows me to keep participating in them is absolutely necessary. In a strange way, it almost does seem like your life is in jeopardy if you cannot partake in the sport that has held such an influential role in your life.
It does, however, make sense that some people might look at these athletic surgeries as “cosmetic surgeries.” To most it would appear that this is “cosmetic” because playing a sport is optional and no one is forcing the person to take part, but I think before people jump to conclusions to make this claim, I think they need to take into account the fact that to some individuals it really does feel like their life is put in jeopardy and that there is no other choice.
It seems athletes are always getting some sort of surgery so that they can get back on the field as soon as possible. Pitchers get Tommy John surgery and football players have bone spurs and chips removed. Though these surgeries do not save the lives of the players, in many cases, they save their livelihood. Without these surgeries, many athletes’ careers would have been over long ago. However, with these relatively safe procedures, athletes are coming back and performing as well as they were before their injury. While safety must always be the primary goal of any ethical operation, these athletes have been well-informed and know what they are getting themselves into. Therefore, in these situations, surgery is a good step to take and has become the regular course of action when regular physical therapy isn’t enough. While Sam is not a professional athlete, her decision to get surgery in order to play college lacrosse places her with others who have made a similar decision. Though this surgery might not have saved her life, I do not necessarily believe that the surgery was cosmetic. A cosmetic surgery implies something superficial, like appearance, rather than Sam’s situation in which there was a need for surgery if she wanted to continue playing lacrosse. As such, Sam’s decision to go ahead with the surgery was reasonable and rational and will enable her to play lacrosse at one of the highest levels and, more importantly, pain free.
Sam’s post opens up a new perspective for me. Before reading her post, when I think of cosmetic surgery I imagine people perfecting their faces or body structures so that they can gain a competitive edge in job market, or a more general competition in life. I was not opposed to such unnecessary practice, however I knew I wouldn’t go through any cosmetic surgery either. Although appearances do play a role in leaving people a good first impression, I don’t think it’s the decisive factor.
Reading Sam’s post changed the way I used to think. If lacrosse is what Sam loves and wants to do in the next four years, then she has a right to pursue her passion even if it means she has to undergo an enhancing surgery. Before I looked at cosmetic surgery as a tool to boost people’s confidence so that they can feel superior and better about themselves. But now I realized that it is also a method to facilitate a person to pursue his dream and passion. One can argue that it’s a bit too much for an eighteen-year-old college athlete to undergo leg muscle surgery so she can play lacrosse for four more years. But Sam’s strong feeling towards lacrosse justifies whatever surgery she decides to take in order to play the sport she loves. And applying the rationale to facial cosmetic surgery: if one person feels strong passion about a career, be it modeling or theater, and her performance can be enhanced by some surgery, then there is nothing wrong or controversial about taking the surgery needed.
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